> Could this meeting be something that God planned for me...

In past discussions, I've learned you attend a Pentacostal church. In my opinion, Pentacostals and other charismatic churches generally get the Biblical plan of salvation right, but I do have a few problems with them, and I'm going to discuss one. I would advise you to see how biblically consistent this is and make a decision for yourself about whether I'm right or not. I'm just going to throw something out. Other observers to this thread: this post isn't going to mean anything to you unless you are a practicing fundamentalist or charismatic Christian, so don't bother with it in that case.

My point, basically, is this: God's plan for your life does not map out every detail of your life. Unless there is some rare exception that may or may not even happen in this age, God's plan probably doesn't include who you will marry, what jobs you will take, etc. Yes, God has a plan for your life, but God's plan is given in the Bible. It's for you to follow Him, to be a living witness for Christ; if you get married, to be a godly husband and give spiritual guidance to your family. When the Bible says God has a plan for each of our lives, we have a tendency to project what WE think of as a life plan onto God's idea of a life plan. When we think of a life plan, we think, ok, the big things: what school do I go to, what do I major in, who do I marry, where to I take a job, how many kids do I have? That's not necessarily what God finds most important, nor is it necessarily as *specific* as God's plan for your life is. He did give us free will, and he didn't do that just to direct our every action and bemoan the choices we make that fall outside of that direction. There is no biblical basis that God cares about all these details. Biblically, it says God has a plan for our lives, and it says what that plan is. Nowhere does it say He's going to direct these particular life events.

Let me approach the same thing from another angle. What about minor details? Do you think God cares what shirt you choose to wear on a particular morning? The T-shirt with Godzilla on it, or the button-up with Mickey Mouse on the pocket? If God cares, you're falling outside of his will -- maybe even sinning? -- if you pick the wrong one. Does that make any sense at all? So having established that there are SOME details of your life that God leaves up to you and has no preference on, it stands to reason, therefore, that somewhere there is a line between what is important to God and what is not. Where is that line? Again, refer back to the Bible and see if there is an expression of God's concern for what job we take and whom we marry and what we study in school.

Another angle. Some people retroactively "prove" that God has a set plan for all the details by what happens in their lives. You choose one job over another, and you meet a suicidal co-worker who you lead to Christ. God in action! God meant from the very beginning for you to take that job and play that role in that co-worker's life! Well, not necessarily. If you weren't there, who's to say God wouldn't have used someone else? If you took the other job instead, who's to say there weren't two suicidal co-workers you could have helped?

Another angle. If God does have a specific plan for your life, more specific than what is given generally in the Bible, it means, therefore, that either God has this plan and doesn't tell you what it is (!?) or that he speaks to you and tells you what it is in some way -- a voice in your head, in your dreams, whatever. The former is kind of silly. The latter most charismatics and Pentecostals do, in fact, believe. I do not. Because these are the ramifications: (1) If God manifests himself to you in some sort of undeniably divine form, how is your following of Him based in faith rather than proof, faith being the basis for our relationship with God. (2) If God speaks to you in a deniable or refutable form, how are you to differentiate that direction from the speaking of an unclean spirit? Unclean spirits are out there -- that much is biblical -- and they love to deceive people, posing as the voice of God. (3) If God does speak to you at all, via any means, then what he says to you bears truth and authority equal to that of the Bible, the Word of God. If what you think God told you conflicts with the Word of God in any way, that is sufficient to disprove it. If it duplicates something in the Word of God, why on earth would he command us to study his Word, if he's just going to tell us what we don't know? If it is consistent with the Word of God but extends it, why would God do this in a manner that could be mistaken? If what God tells you involves another person, even if you *could* be sure beyond a doubt it comes from God and should be respected as equally truthful and reliable and commanding as the Bible, why should whoever else it involves believe you?

I do believe God cares about our lives, even the details, but I don't believe God seeks to utilize our free will by channeling it along a set path. God's will concerning you is to follow him, worship him, pray, be a witness for Christ, live according to the doctrine presented in the parts of the Bible addressed to people living in this post-cross, pre-millenial age (in a nutshell, refer to the middle of Acts to Philemon for doctrine, and everywhere else for principles), and be loving to God, yourself, and your family, and your neighbors. Beyond that, make your own choices and pray that God would work a good thing with what you decide.

Now, accepting all of the above, look where that puts you. It's reassuring news. It means you don't have to stress about missing some random opportunity you imagine just must have been ordained by God from the beginning of time, setting it up so precisely and perfectly except for the fact that in the natural course of things you miss it and, oops, too bad, can't happen now, your life is screwed, or at least only mildly damaged so long as you don't also miss the fleeting opportunity of Plan B, with the next-most suitable wife on the planet for you.

It's work enough to abide by the principles actually in the Bible, a task enough to follow God's lead as he seeks to change us into the people he wants us to be by nature. The added stress many Christians pile upon themselves in the form of paranoia and second-guessing about what particular happenstance God might passionately care about today is an insane burden to bear.

Bottom line. Stop thinking so much. If you want to meet single Christian women, meeting them at church functions is a great way to do it, but I would strongly, strongly advise you not to wonder which one God might have a red 'X' on and has designated since the beginning of time to be your wife, and if you screw it up, woe be you.