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It's a Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad Movie

Reader Review


Jack Frost (1997)

Posted by: Susan
Date Submitted: Wednesday, July 14, 1999 at 17:29:30
Date Posted: Monday, July 19, 1999 at 05:47:34

When I saw the review for this movie on this site, I made Jack Frost third on my list of bad movies to see. It should have been first.

I don't think I would have noticed this movie on the shelf without that great box. It was a holographic box with a cheesy snowman on it that turns into a snarling dog-like snowman, with the caption, "He chills... He kills." It's creepy enough, if only for the fact that the person who thought up the box was clearly demented (or had been hit with a 2x4 numerous times).

Dave said that the snowman (and the snow) looked like shredded soap. My brother, Aaron, whom I forced into watching this movie, says that the snowman looked like coconut shavings.

My biggest gripe about the snow and scenery was that it was quite clearly summer when this movie was shot. It would be all right if only pines and the like had their green, but I'm pretty sure I saw a maple in the background.

Aaron and I thought that the kid was stupid beyond words. The boy's about ten? And he's still cooking stuff that looks like it came out of the back end of a dog? And apart from that, he doesn't know not to bake anti-freeze into the food he makes? (Which, by the way, our hero praises him for.)

My favorite scene was when Jack Frost is all dissolved in the anti-freeze, and the kid picks up a pillow-like object. "You forgot this arm, dad!" says quite possibly the stupidest movie kid I've ever seen, as the pillow wraps around him. The kid is then thrown in the anti-freeze and freed from his pillow. When the kid is taken out, his parents kiss him. Parents should learn a lesson from this. Whenever your kid's been soaked in anti-freeze, don't make him bathe and change clothes right away, marinate him in the chemicals a little longer. For extra points, kiss his chemically drenched head.

Rating: 4.5 turkeys, if watched with a group.

Scene to watch for: Jill dries her hair, then takes a bath.

Best line: "You forgot this arm, dad!"

Things that make you go "Huh?": The whole "Snow balls, no balls" thing, and why Jill and Tommy broke into the sheriff's house.


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