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Re: Weird Movies
Posted By: Morris Cecil Glalet, Th.D., on host 205.188.197.33
Date: Wednesday, October 27, 1999, at 16:23:00
In Reply To: Re: Weird Movies posted by Stephen on Tuesday, October 26, 1999, at 19:39:00:

> > I've always liked weird movies, too (except the ones that don't really have a point or a plot, like "2001" [that had no plot, or it had two plots, or it had twelve plots, but it didn't have on], and the ones that are just there for special effects purposes [like "2001"]),
>
> Eck. Don't even want to talk about 2001.
>
> > and I'm actually writing one right now (yes, I write movies, and books, and songs, and TV shows, although none of them have been publicly [or privately] released) that is about this kid who is afraid of going into circuses. He's fine watching shows or movies or reading books about circuses, but actually being inside a circus tent scares the fudge out of him. So, he goes to bed one night, and space rips, and a hand pulls him through the tear, and when he wakes up, he is in a circus with no exit, and everyone tries to kill him, except for the clowns, who try to help him, but the evil ringmaster kills them, and then they keep trying to kill him, and they torture him and stuff, but he finally gets away by taking the Wheel Of Death (the actual name of a thing at a circus I went to once---I don't remember what it did) and rolling out of there, and he thinks everything is wonderful, but then he finds out that he is in a big, evil building in an alternate dimension with no way out and he's trapped there forever and all is not well the end. It's going to be way swell. No sneaky stealing my idea now.
>
> Seeing as someday I intend to be a Hollywood exec, I'll offer my take on how to change your story.
>
> First off, you need a dog sidekick for the boy and a spunky friend-girl/love interest (depending on how old the boy is) to help him out. If the boy's over like say 14 then they need to start out hating each other and end up falling in love. If they're younger, then they'll start off hating each other and end up being friends. The dog should save the boy roughly three times, and then appear to die in the climax but turn out to be fine before the credits.
>
> Now, your plot is a little "audience unfriendly". First we need to establish that the clowns are rather happy folks. We'll get Jim Carrey to play one of them, and maybe have the rest be the Adam Sandler or something. None of them (except for maybe the clown that also happens to be a member of a minority group) can die. Especially not Jim Carrey. For the evil Ringmaster, let's see if we can't get Steve Buscemi or some other quirky and fun character actor to give him a bit more "pizazz" (perhaps even somebody else like Hugh Grant? Give him a sort of "love to hate him" quality... like the Joker from the old Batman TV series, the good one with Adam West). Maybe he could spout out some clever one liners, like when the kid is on the trapeeze or high-wire (you've got a trapeeze set piece in there, right?) the Ringmaster could say "You know, falling won't hurt... but the ground'll kill ya! Muahahaha!" That adds "suspense" and "humor" to an otherwise too dark moment.
>
> Now, the boy shouldn't get tortured. I say he gets captured, but before he's tortured he's rescued by the dog or something. I like your idea for the "Wheel of Death" but the ending HAS to go. At the end, they capture/kill the Ringmaster and all go safely home, where the Jim Carrey character starts up a joke shop or something. It'd be much more audience friendly.
>
> Ste "Actually, I'm not sold on the whole circus idea. Could we change the setting? Maybe a creepy old building or something, and Jim Carrey could play a crazy Night Watchman who gets tangled up in things..." phen

Those are terrible ideas! You've taken my wonderful, personal expression of my fear of going to the circus and turned it into a kid-friendly crapfest! The dog and spunky love-interest add nothing to the story (besides, the girl shouldn't be in his bedroom while he's asleep). The movie, since it is not a comedy, should not star comedians. The ringmaster can't be "fun", he has to be menacing, evil, sadistic, and demonic! No clever one-liners (not a comedy), and the pain and torture bit has to stay, because it's a substantial part of the movie, and besides, it gives him a reason to be afraid of the circus. And I absolutely WILL NOT allow a happily-ever-after ending. This is a drama, it is not supposed to be "audience-friendly". These changes will turn it into a PG, which is not the kind of movie this is (probably PG-13, possibly even R). These are terrible ideas that make the movie no different from the thousand kids' movies that are made today.
As for your career as a Hollywood exec, you'll be rich.

-Morris Cecil "You're not one for make-you-think movies, are you?" Glalet, Th.D.
Wed 27 Oct A.D. 1999

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