I read Wizard Magazine (suprise it's about comics) and in each issue there is a little interview called Off The Cuff. Just a short little thing ussualy with a creator. In there October issue they interviewed Satan. I just wanted to share.

SATAN: Current Work: Yugoslavia, North Korea, Internet stocks, Pat Buchanan
Wizard: Before we get started, do you prefer Satan, Lucifer, Beelzebub, or what?
Satan: Satan's fine, I don't mind Lucifer.
W: Anyone ever call you Lucy for short?
[Silence]
W: Er, so you've been pretty busy lately?
S: I wanted to get in a few suprises before the end of the century. To be honest, I'm behind schedule. Tick tock, tick tock, you know.
W: Anything special we can look forward to?
S: Watch Taiwan, watch North Korea, and don't eat meat from New Jersy.
W: Which religion is the true religion?
S: Are you crazy? I'm not answering that. I thought this interview would be about comic books.
W: Not this time. C'mon. Give it up. Which one?
S: [Sigh] Okay, but if God asks, you didn't hear it from me. It's the Hare Krishnas. They're on the mark.
W: Seriously?
S: Big time. Shave your heads, people, and wear nothing but pink robes.
W: I think you're lying.
S: Ofcourse I'm lying! I'm SATAN, you moron! Now change the subject or I'm hanging up the phone.
W: What about the Millenium Bug? Did you have a hand in the Y2K problem?
S: Oh no, I was too busy in the '60s working on bell bottoms to set up something like that. You'll just see me fiddle with the ATMs a little when it hits.
W: So the world isn't going to end January 1, 2000.
S: No, no, not Januray 1, 2000. Crackers, you people are dumb.
W: What's that supposed to mean?
S: The new millennium starts January 1, 2001. All the nerds keep pointing that out, and you guys just keep making fun of 'em. People make my job so easy, I tell you.
W: Wait, so the world's gonna end in 2001?
S: I didn't say that, you did. Just don't invest in real estate.
W: I can't belive this.
S: Look, when the moon turns to blood and the dead rise from the graves, just stay indoors and blast "Livin' la Vida Loca" on you stereo. The dead hate it. You'll be okay.
W: But I can't stand that song.
S: Tell me about it. Talk about overplayed.
(Interview by Doug Goldstein)

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