> > > -semi-related: I wrote a paper last year about how I eat Smarties. People stayed away from me for about a week after I read it.
> > >
> > > Chris
> >
> > *Sidling up*
> >
> > Soooooo, Chris kid, Just how do you smartly eat Smarties that it's nimbly noteworthy? :-)
>
> OK, here's a guess - pick your gross Smartie eating method. Either you:
> 1) Try to nibble all the coating off first and then end up with a dripping, gnawed, bare blobby melting thing; or
> 2) Bite it in half, try to pick all the inside out with your tongue, and end up with a dripping, gnawed, sticky blobby melting thing.
> I mean, how else *can* you eat them?
>
> Brunnen-"Do that? Of course I don't do that! I just, er, noticed other people doing it"G


I don't do either technique. Come to think of it, I learned to eat Smarties the same way as does Skyler, the superintelligent African Grey Parrot. *Nobody* can beat a parrot for neatly cracking a shell edgewise and getting the sweet inner nutmeat out, all in one piece. Skyler is pleased to offer you advanced shellcracking lessons at a mere $25 an hour.

Wolfspirit

"When-you-eat-your-Smarties,
Do-you-eat-the-red-ones-last?
Keep 15 in your pocket,
then-eat-them-very-fast.
You need at least that many
'fore the aphrodisiac effect kicks in:
When-you-eat-your-Smarties,
Do-you-eat-the-red-ones-last?"