BEING JOHN MALKOVICH
Though very good
And often sad
Don't watch it with
Your mom and dad

DEVIL'S ADVOCATE
Are you surprised
All said and done
To find Keanu's
The devil's son?

DR. STRANGELOVE (OR, HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND LOVE THE BOMB)
Sellers, Sellers,
Sellers again
Brings the Cold War
To an end

THE GREAT RACE
Tony Curtis --
Sparkling smile --
He tries to drive
The extra mile

HANNIBAL
I read the book
It made me sick
I did not go
To see the flick

IN THE LINE OF FIRE
Malkovich wants
The President to die
Malkovich is scary
And makes me cry

JINGLE ALL THE WAY
Schwarzenegger
Punches a deer
This embraces
All I hold dear

MEN IN BLACK
When teamed with J
They make a pair
Though I'm not sure
If K's all there

MOULIN ROUGE
This film's insane
This film's on crack
I want it on
My movie rack

ON DEADLY GROUND
Tell me now
How strange this rings:
Protect Mother Nature
By blowing up things

THE OTHERS
Nicole Kidman
Has got it bought:
Even as a ghost
She's really hot

THE PEST
I can't believe
They thought this was funny
I can't believe
This movie made money

THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW
I can say nothing
About this to you
In case my mother
Reads this review

STAR TREK: GENERATIONS
He blows up worlds
Proves he's a jerk
Soran is bad
He kills off Kirk

THE WAR OF THE WORLDS
If made today
No heed would be paid
But it gave me nightmares
In third grade

WITNESS
Harrison Ford
Is Amish now
See him learn
To milk a cow


-Eric Sleator
Tue 11 Jun A.D. 2002