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What happened?
Posted By: Sundragyn, on host 142.104.250.115
Date: Sunday, October 28, 2001, at 22:17:00

I thought my life was built on stone, but it was built on sand.
I took things for granted and now they're gone.
I thought I knew these people, but I didn't.
Everything I know is burst to pieces.
What do I do?
I carry on.

That is what I wrote on the message board on my door. After 23 years of marriage, my parents are separating. It's under friendly circumstances, at the very least, although some of the reasons for it made me realize that there was a lot that I didn't, and still don't, know about my mother. One of the things that I discovered about her is that we were dealing with the same personal questions, at the same time, but separately, without a clue that we were doing so, and came to the same conclusion.

A 40+ woman whom I consider a friend hugged me today, looked me in the eye, and asked me if I'm angry with her. I certainly have the right. She says she would be angry if she were in my place. But I'm not. She's been a friend for too long, there's too much I owe her. And, after all, I only want my parents to be happy.

I am okay, I am only dealing with the shock. I feel numb most of the time, except for the occasional moment when I realize that what I knew is no longer true, and tears prick my eyes. Numb. Just... numb.

But I carry on. What else can any mortal do?

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