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Noticing (and Saying) the Little Things
Posted By: Jezzika, on host 65.7.7.68
Date: Monday, June 11, 2001, at 11:56:42
In Reply To: Forum poll: is romance better than honesty? posted by Brunnen-G on Sunday, June 10, 2001, at 15:12:18:

I'd say #2 is my choice. But I think it includes more than just "romantic" gestures. I think everyone have clearly expressed why #2 is their choice, so I'll just expand upon it.

I agree with Mousie's take on the little things. Love is more than just gazing into the other's eyes or a cure for loneliness---it's also about really paying attention to the other person.

I can't hear "I love you" too many times. But sometimes, other things mean just as much. When the person notices things you weren't even expecting them to notice, it shows they love you even more than just saying "I love you."

For example: One of the sweetest things Mike ever said to me wasn't even meant to be romantic. I had done something for a person, and Mike remarked that I had shown "taste and character." He didn't say it in a gushy way, he said it matter-of-factly. I didn't even know he had seen me do what I did.

When my father came to visit, I noticed little things that Mike was doing to make my father feel welcome and at home. I told him that I had noticed, and that I appreciated it. And we say these things every day, though we've never talked about it.

Those types of "little things" are just as important as flowers and proclamations of love. Partly because they can't be faked, and are never dishonest.