> My heart goes out to you, MM. I've just recently found out that my ex is getting married next month, which shook me a bit. But it didn't make me feel as bad as I thought it would. I expected to feel more hurt, I think, and I was quite happy to see that it didn't bother me that much.
> And I think the main reason for that was time.
> We broke up quite a few years ago now, and at the time we both wanted to stay friends and be honest with each other. Several weeks after our break up, I found out that he'd started seeing someone else straight away. and he hadn't told me. That kind of destroyed any real friendship between us, because there was no trust.
> I know your situation is different, but don't take the healing force of time lightly. For your own sake, try and get some time to yourself, so that you can get your locus of control back inside.
>
> ding"thinking happy thoughts for you"dong

Thanks... I have had a lot of time to myself (well, away from Amanda at least) and I had noticed that when we DO talk, the only way we could talk without upsetting me was to talk about trivial things. I am beginning to think that if we are going to continue at all as friends, that will have to be the extent of it... Of course, I don't know if I can handle knowing that she is intentionally keeping things from me. Of course, when I think about it, I don't even really care... More and more, I'm leaning towards the "break off all contact" option which several people have suggested to me.

On another note, my roommate came up with a VERY good explanation for why I was so upset about all this. Quite simply, Amanda said that she would keep me informed about dating developments in her life, and then she did not do so until I asked her directly about it-- Basically, she lied to me. At first I thought this wouldn't be enough to bother me, but then my roommate pointed out that it isn't very often that I find out that someone has lied directly to me. To Amanda's credit, she always seems to tell me the truth when I ask the right questions, but still...

Anyway, I'm still thinking a lot about all this, but I also have some important work to get done, so I'd best get back to it.

Don "Wow, Rinkies are supportive... It's always nice to be reminded of that" Monkey