> Tallahassee - Jan. 27, 2001 -
> The conflict between the Bush and Gore forces continues. Both sides have launched jet fighter attacks on selected targets here in Florida's capital city. Long columns of refugees are headed toward Mobile in neutral Alabama.
>
> There have been reports of clashes between gunboats on Lake Okeechobee and the Intercoastal Waterway.
>
> Meanwhile warships of the Gore forces have been shelling Republician targets along the Panhandle
> and Bush's high-altitude bombers have been pattern bombing Palm Beach County. Street fighting is widespread in Miami. Guerrilla forces are active in the Everglades.
>
> The Florida legislature has been evacuated to Austin, Texas, but reports indicate that it is disorganized and on the verge of becoming an unruly mob.
>
> Florida's Supreme Court and Attorney General are reportedly in hiding somewhere in the Jacksonville area.
>
> In the nation's capital, Acting President, Bill Clinton, is trying desperately to prevent armed conflict between the Supreme Court and Congress.
> It is expected that he will flee to New York if fighting breaks out in the District of Columbia.
>
> In the meantime, former presidents Jimmy Carter and Gerald Ford have been appointed to jointly chair a "peace committee" which may include Jesse Jackson, Jesse Ventura, Bernard Shaw and/or Ophra.
>
> Little is being said about last year's election as both sides are too busy fighting.

Howard, you kill me! I laughed out loud over that, so then my co-workers wanted to know what was so funny. They got a kick out of it, too.

Ell"Howard: The new and improved Dan Rather"myruh