> There can just never be enough names to refer to a person who seems to be in complete lack of the *sixth* and most important of our senses: common.
> One of my personal favorites that I use is Doofi. The plural of Doofus. It's for when someone is just too stupid for just one person, they must be plural.
>
> My father-in-law was recently telling me about a new woman at his work. I think she was possibly Vietnamese, and her first name was Twit. While, I'm sure, perfectly innocent in her home country, she just didn't understand why people would giggle upon introduction. --Poor girl.
>
> Tra "now Conway Twitty, he should just know better" nio

What's wrong with Conway? I think it's a nice name. Just because it's usually a last name doesn't mean it can't be a first name. Lots of names are like that. For example,
Howard