Here is a subject that has been buzzing around in my head for quite some time. Names--many, if not most of the people who regularly post to this message forum use some sort of 'handle' as the CB'ers call it--a name that might be meaningful if you know the story behind it, or might just be something cool thought up by the user, but is definitely not the person's legal name. In fact, I can only think of four 'regular posters' who use what is or at least might be their real name here in the message forum, and two of them are me and Sam.

But it isn't really 'handles' I want to talk about, its nicknames and variations on legal names that has me thinking lately. My full legal name is David Jason Parker, and I don't care who knows it. I'm not one of these people who is embarrased by his name--in fact, I'm in love with my name and I think it's the most perfect name in all the world (so there :-P). I think it has this great and powerful cadance to it if you say it the way I like to say, it: DA-vid JA-son PAR-ker. I like the way that sounds, and I'm thankful my parents gave me this name (David is both my maternal Uncle's and Grandfather's name) and not one from the other side of my family (or else I might have ended up as a Wayne or a Eugene or an Ernest, none of which I'm overly fond of, no offence to anyone out there with those names.)

But, of course, I don't go by "David Jason Parker" in my day to day life. Most everybody who knows me calls me "Dave", and although that has become a very generic name as of late, I'm still quite fond of it. In fact, when Sam first told me that you can overload operators and function calls in C++, I immediately decided that I would henceforth name all my functions "Dave." It's a very good thing I haven't done a lick of C++ programming since then, or I'd have some very nasty code on my hands.

Anyway, I haven't always been known as "Dave." For the first five or so years of my life, I was "David" almost exclusivly--my family only fairly recently started calling me "Dave". When I went to school, I became "Dave" fairly quickly to my classmates, out of this natural tendency of most people to shorten peoples names to a mono-syllabic form for easy handling. I call my fiance Melanie "Mel" most of the time, and Sam's wife Darleen has a mono-syllabic nickname that isn't an immediately obvious one and doesn't follow the general "format" that these types of things usually take--although I don't think I've called her anything but in years. Even "Sam" is short for "Samuel", as we all know, although I've never personally called him anything but "Sam" and I don't think I've ever heard anybody call him "Samuel."

The funny thing is, it is only fairly recently that I have actually started *thinking* of myself as "Dave" and not "David." For most of my life, I reflexivly introduced myself as "David" even though I was almost universally known as "Dave." In fact, it used to be somewhat of a game for me to say "Hi, I'm David" to someone I'd just met and wait to see how long it took them to shorten it on their own. Usually, about two seconds--"Hi Dave, I'm Joe!" Occaisionally people would ask if I preferred one form or the other, and I'd be honest and say it didn't matter--and then they'd universally call me "Dave" from there on out.

In fact, I can only think of one case in which I introduced myself as "David" and the person called me that religiously thereafter. In fact, I think that was the last time I ever concsiously introduced myself as "David" because I found it so jarring thereafter when this person always called me that and didn't shorten it. I had a programming class my Junior year at college, and met a guy in that class through a rather strange means--I sort of hit on his girlfriend's roomate over the computer (nothing very serious, really, and it was only once) and somehow (and I'm still not clear how this happened) he found out who I was and that we had a class together. One day in class, he noticed a book I was carrying around from a previous class, and he recognized it as one that his girlfriend also had--it turned out that I *also* had a class with his girlfriend. So I ended up becoming reletively good friends with him and his girlfriend that semester, but never *once* actually *met* the girl I had initially hit on to start this whole cycle.

Anyway, back to the point--when I introduced myself to the guy's girlfriend in our class, I introduced myself as "David." And she called me that forever after. And it bugged the *heck* out of me! Now, I love the name "David" and I always have, but I'd spent so many years as "Dave" I had finally stopped thinking of myself as "David" and instead internally adopted the diminutive form of the name. So I no longer identified with the name "David" and it jarred me to hear myself addressed as such. The really funny thing is that her boyfriend called me Dave just like everyone else--but even when they were talking to me, standing side by side with each other, he'd call me "Dave" and she'd call me "David." Weird stuff.

But it doesn't stop there. When I started writing "seriously" and submitting my stories to magazines, I decided that my "writing name" would be "David J. Parker". So that's the form of my name I used on everything. I put a little thought into it. At first I thought I might use the full form, "David Jason Parker." But I decided that would be too long--I don't like it when the author's name takes up more space on the book than the title does, and frankly, neither do book publishers or cover artists. Also, when I see an author's name on a book, that's how I think of them, and I'm sure that's how I'd address them if I ever met them. So even if "Orson Scott Card" goes by "Orson" or "Scotty" or "Ore" (and I truly have no idea what he goes by in his personal life) he'd always and forever be "Orson Scott Card" to me, and that's probably how I'd address him. And I couldn't *imagine* someone coming up to me and saying "Hey, you're David Jason Parker!" It would just bug the heck out of me. But I also didn't want the informal "Dave Parker" to be my "official" name, so I needed something else. I toyed with "D. Jason Parker," "D.J. Parker" and just plain "David Parker." But none of those were satisfactory at all, except for the last one, and I still thought that one was a little plain. So I eventually decided to insert the middle initial, and that's where it's stood ever since. And if I ever do get anything published, that's the name you'll see it under, guaranteed.

But it gets weirder still. I don't *ever* remember telling Sam about this "decision." And yet, from the very beginning of RinkWorks, everything I've had a hand in has been credited to "David J. Parker" just like I like it, without my having to say anything. It's entirely possible I told him about it and forgot, or that he just picked it up off the many stories I've had him read and critique for me, but I'd rather believe that it's some spooky coincidence, because that somehow makes me feel like I chose the "right" pen name. :-)

And anyway, that's my long disertation on names. Hope somebody takes the time to read it, because I had to get it out somewhere :-)

David J. Parker
AKA
Dave